(Video below)
When you need to get something off your chest…
Write a letter to the person you're missing.
STEPS:
1. Start simple. "Dear _____"
2. Spill out your heart on the paper. Ex. How you're feeling, what you miss about them, what's going on in life you'd like them to be part of, etc.
3. Sign it.
4. Read it out loud. Consider reading the letter to a picture of your loved one or to an empty chair where your loved one might sit.
Why this is so effective: The act of writing gives your emotional brain an opportunity to interact with your logical brain. It allows them to connect.
So often in grief, the rational, logical part of our brain is desperately grasping at straws, trying to make sense of the loss, while the emotional brain is running rampant, spinning the logical side into a tizzy of confusion, depression, and frustration.
Healing from loss consists of gradually finding harmony between the logical brain and the emotional brain. It's a process made possible by repeated, intentional neural connections. Writing, speaking, and other forms of communication are amazing tools for doing just that.
So whether it's writing in a journal, or scribbling on a post-it note, venting out loud to the clouds, processing with a therapist, or talking to a close friend, the sooner you can get to expressing your experience with loss, the better!
I have seen this method work for myself and others, time after time.
In short: Writing is healing. Talking is healing.
So, say what you need to say. Honestly and openly express whatever feelings you need to get off your chest. You'll be so glad you did.